Irrelevance Glorified

(note : originally written in 1999. Depressingly, still applicable)
If you’d watch the movies and television shows, which I bet you do, you’d think that there’s two great forces in the world, especially in fanstasy books. There’s GOOD and there’s EVIL, constantly caught in a everlasting battle for the domination of the world. That’s the fictional world, I fear. There is a battle being waged, but it isn’t between good evil, light or dark, or even “less filling” and “tastes great.” This epic conflict is between the competent and the ignorant. Continue Reading »

(note : originally written in 1999)

If you are a normal member of the masses, you have no doubt either seen a movie or a read a book which involved time travel as a main premise. Some notables that come to mind are H.G. Wells’ “The Time Machine”, the unforgettable Terminator movies, and the somewhat confusing Back to the Future series. In all these movies, we find that things get pretty messed up in the future. A key plot element in these stories is that people are trying to change the present by affecting the past. But you know, things get pretty messed up whenever you start to think about things. If the directors of these movies ever sat down and thought about their plots before they decided to start filming, I’m sure that they’d sit down and go “Hmmmmmm….” And after that they’d probably blow their brains out, because it kinda makes your head hurt. Continue Reading »

(note : originally written in 1998)

Sometimes I wonder what happens after we die. This is a matter of great debate, although perhaps for strange reasons, since it doesn’t quite matter since you’re, well, dead. It’s interesting how the afterlife, or even just the suspicion of one, influences the way we live and how we interact with each other. There are many schools of thought, ranging from the whole “hell and heaven” idea to reincarnation. Well, I just started wondering about the logistics of reincarnation…… Continue Reading »

(note : originally written in 1998)

Despite what you may think, UIUC is not the edenesque Valhalla that I may portray. For instance, it rained today. And there wasn’t even a rainbow! Would there be rainbowless rain in Shangri-la? No sir, at least not if I was running it. Don’t get me wrong though. We’re not in Gotham City here. Continue Reading »

(note : originally written in 2002)
All right. I’ll keep this short and sweet because I have great difficulties keeping this idea eloquent if I let it become long and bitter. The great idea is : No religion until you’re 18.
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(note : originally written in 2001)

Sometimes, when I’m bored, I’ll turn on the TV. I try and not do this during the hours of about 1 to 4 pm, however, because it is very difficult to find anything worthwhile to watch. I am pretty much forced to watch either daytime talk shows or idiotic children’s shows. Not even good cartoons Continue Reading »

(note: this was originally written in 2000. Which is why it makes minimal sense now)

As we all know, I have come up with some kooky ideas in the past. Some have been lame, and some have not. Some people have even gone so far as to say that my schemes are stupid. Well, I will be vindicated with this current plan, which is vast in its scope and its goodliness. I will no longer be denounced as a child of the devil, and people may perhaps throw softer fruits at me, rather than the super-dense fruitcakes I have been bombarded with in the past.
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(note: this was originally written in 1999)

I hate meeting new people. It’s a royal pain in the ass. If I had it my way, I would never have to meet new people, only dealing with the people I already know. The astute reader is probably wondering if I realize that at some point I had to meet my current friends. Well I am aware of that, thank you very much, and I must inform you that it was indeed a painful and laborious process. To make a person a good friend you have to invest soooooo much time into them. Time that person with a busy lifestyle or a heavy workload simply cannot afford. You need to get to know each others likes and dislikes, hobbies, background, opinions, those stupid little stories that everyone tells each other, etc. And after all that, there’s a chance that you might not even like them! Then it’s just all been a waste of your time. Well, I have a solution to this dilemma, obviously, or else I wouldn’t be writing this. Continue Reading »

(note: this was originally written in 1999)

“Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”
–George Santayana

“Whoever controls the past, controls the future. Whoever controls the present, controls the past.”
–George Orwell

Perhaps the first quote above is true. But certainly, it seems, the converse isn’t true. If I go to the local bookstore and go to the history aisle, I see shelf upon shelf of books to buy or browse. There’s probably even a separate shelf purely for Military History. Clearly, there are a lot of people who haven’t forgotten about history. And yet the last time I checked, people were making the same mistakes all over again. In many cases, I think that History is the problem in the first place.
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(note: originally written in 1998)

I’ve talked to a few people. No, really. I’m not kidding this time. And a few of those people are not imaginary. And a few of those few people are my age. Being the seriousness minded people that we are, sometimes we talk about our futures and what will become of us as we enter our twenties and thirties. And some of us want kids. This is almost beyond me, I must admit. I never saw the joy and excitement in waiting hand and foot on something that will do nothing but give you grief a few years down the road, but maybe it’s something to do with getting attached to something you’ve had for awhile. I know, I just lost my TI-82 of 4 years, and it physically and emotionally traumatized me. For these reasons, and more, I think that parenting would suck. Continue Reading »